I am so angry with you. You both seem out to destroy me. Dad, in my last conversation with you you said that when I started working for DSIR you thought "it was the end of everything". This just goes to show the type of mentality you have. You are only interested in having a relationship with me if you are the controlling parent. You always want to dominate. Don't you feel ashamed about your attitude towards me? My biggest mistake was turning to you when I was in trouble. Before 1991 I was doing so well and you couldn't touch me. Since that time I have run into difficulties and you have used that as an opportunity to build up your own pathetic little egos. Both of you have such low self-esteem (which is one reason why you were both so proud of being parents and wanted to keep me under your control for ever). I heard you laughing as I hung up last time I spoke to you, Dad. You kept on talking about Mum. Mum's going to do this...Mum's going to do that, etc. Were you unconsciously comparing me to her? You may think she is stronger than me but she is not. She couldn't even study English by correspondence on her own. She doesn't try to do the things I do so that's why she doesn't run into as much difficulty. I hate you both. You have never been good parents. You have always hated me! Why??? You never tried to help me develop as a person. No, you can't have your books back. And yes, you are a sicko. Fourth letter...

Tessa sent us this letter in March 1995, about nine months before she was admitted to the psychiatric ward of a public hospital and diagnosed as suffering from schizophrenia. For the first five sentences, it is in normal handwriting. It then lurches into capital letters. It contains no greeting, and is unsigned.